


Legiterally

by cillafix



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Desperation, Friendship, Gen, Omorashi, Pee, Trapped In Elevator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-23
Updated: 2018-03-23
Packaged: 2019-04-07 03:36:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14072043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cillafix/pseuds/cillafix
Summary: Phichit and Yuuri have some trouble getting back to their hotel room the night before competition. Um I write about pee please read the tags





	Legiterally

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place the season before canon, their ages are 19 and 22/almost 23. I know when Skate America took place in Chicago irl, I'm following in the steps of canon and being ambiguous about whether it's consistent with real-life events lol. Once again I'm the-kittyscarf on tumblr talk to me

"It's already midnight. This is so embarrassing. I hope nobody sees us walk through the lobby, do you think we could go in through the pool, or something? Is there a keycard door?"

"I have to pee so bad."

"Aaaaand I'm talking to myself. That's great."

"I'll listen to you after I pee."

"Thanks, Phichit, I know I can always count on you."

Yuuri and Phichit paid the cab driver, hopped out of the car and were nearly knocked over by howling wind. A violent storm had arrived while they were out and neither had left the hotel dressed as warmly as they should have. They scrambled inside, shielding their faces.

"I'm never going outside again," Yuuri grumbled, pausing in the lobby to brush leaves and debris out of his hair. "How are you still drinking iced coffee in this?"

"I'm not a quitter," Phichit said, shivering. He drained the rest of his coffee until he was loudly slurping air, then triumphantly tossed the cup into a bin.

"It's windy, isn't it?" asked a cheery young woman working at the front desk.

"Yeah, don't go out there, the weather tried to kill us." Phichit pressed the elevator call button, looked up at the ceiling and bounced on his heels a few times.

"It's supposed to clear up by tomorrow. Have a good night," the receptionist laughed.

"Thanks, you too," Yuuri said nervously. The elevator opened and he and Phichit continued on their way. "Do you think she knows who we are?" he added as soon as the doors shut.

"Maybe? Even if she doesn't know who we are, they usually know which events are in town, you know?" Yuuri groaned and slumped against the wall.

"Oh, don't worry about that, even if she does, even if we totally flop tomorrow, some randomer isn't going to go to the press with the story that we stayed up slightly late-"

Halfway to the eleventh floor, the lights abruptly died - both boys screamed, found one another in the dark and grabbed at each other for support, before the lighting flickered back on and they stumbled apart again.

"Oh my god, I almost peed all over myself," Phichit complained.

"Shit, shit, shit, where are we? Did we stop moving?" Yuuri stabbed the '11' button repeatedly. "Nothing's happening! Fuck!"

"Try the emergency button."

"The emergency button?! This is a situation where we have to press an emergency button?"

Phichit pushed Yuuri aside and pressed the button himself. Yuuri clenched his teeth and fists in anticipation, staring at the speaker.

"Ugh," Phichit whined. Yuuri looked up. "There's not enough service in here to go live."

"Go live?!" Yuuri almost exploded, but the crackling of the speaker interrupted him.

"Hilton Inn and Suites Northwest, how may I help you?" said the same receptionist from a minute earlier.

"Hey, so we're in the elevator right now, and I think we're stuck," Phichit explained.

"Oh, no, I hope not. Have you tried holding the 'door open' button?"

Phichit followed the instructions, but the button refused to illuminate or produce any result.

"Yeah, no, nothing happened."

"How many of you are in there?"

"Only two," Yuuri said.

"Any injuries or distress?"

"D-Distress?" Yuuri whimpered.

"Do either of you need medical attention?"

"No," he squeaked. The receptionist paused.

"No, we're good," Phichit spoke up over Yuuri, though his voice faltered and he stepped in place for a few seconds as he said it.

"Alright. I'm going to call the company and have them send an emergency technician out. Whatever you do, please don't attempt to force the doors open, you're completely safe as long as you stay in the elevator. We'll update you as soon as we can."

"Oh. My god. How long are we going to be in here?" Yuuri said as soon as the call ended.

"Hopefully not too long, I-"

"What if we breathe all the air and there's no air left?"

"She said we're completely safe?" Phichit tried to reassure him.

"What if she didn't think of that situation? Do you think we should call back and ask?" Yuuri didn't process why Phichit was backing into his personal space until he raised his phone in front of them. "Are you kidding me?" Phichit snapped a photo, then hopped to the opposite wall to document it.

"Do not publish this! Don't post it, don't send it to anyone, don't tell anyone about it, just don't," Yuuri pleaded, trying to get his hands on Phichit's phone. By the time he wrested it from Phichit's grasp, a tweet was already uploading, and though he tried to cancel ("Don't you dare, that is MY CONTENT") it was too late. The picture that popped up showed Phichit making an overwrought upset expression in the foreground, with Yuuri behind him rolling his eyes. _We are LEGITERALLY out here stuck in the elevator lmao I thought this was supposed to be a fancy hotel? I gotta peeeeeeeee #badtiming_ , the caption read.

"Fine! We're going to spend the night in the elevator, and we're going to be the laughing stock of Skate America! I'll get used to it!" Yuuri huffed. Phichit planted himself in front of Yuuri and put his hands on Yuuri's shoulders.

"Yuuri. I'm sure the hotel people and the elevator company know what to do about this. It sounded like the receptionist had a list of stuff to ask us, this has happened before, and they have someone they can call who's going to come and fix it. Okay?"

"Okay," Yuuri said, nodding meekly.

"And then we'll be free and we can eat the entire container of coconut milk ice cream in the minifridge and watch Dance Moms, because we deserve it."

"Wait-"

"After I go to the bathroom. Because I seriously hope they let us out of here before I explode," Phichit added, spun around and paced across the confined space.

"Okay, first of all, I appreciate the thought, but we're not doing that, because in case you forgot, we're COMPETING TOMORROW. Run-through is in seven hours. Celestino is going to kill us."

"Celestino!" Phichit exclaimed as he grabbed his phone back from Yuuri.

"Do NOT call Celestino! Oh my god!"

"Hello? Ciao Ciao? ... ...Yyyyeah, about that. Did you see my tweet? ... Oh. Well, that's okay, I mean, I literally just posted it a minute ago, so, yeah. ... ...It's kind of a funny story. So, we're actually stuck in the elevator? ...The elevator. Sorry, the signal in here sucks. ... ...We called the front desk, and they're calling the elevator people or something, so I guess? I don't know, and I'm kind of freaking out because I drank an entire- what? Yeah, he's right here, he's fine, do you wanna talk to him?" Phichit looked up at Yuuri, who protested frantically and waved his hands. "Oh? Alright, thanks!" Phichit ended the call looking slightly surprised. "He's on his way."

"On his way?!" Yuuri said, exasperated. "We're at the mercy of the elevator company, why is he-"

"He doesn't want to kill us, if that helps?"

"But you're turning this into some kind of reality show. We've been in here for less than 5 minutes and you've already made sure everyone will be able to look at us tomorrow and know we came in at midnight and got stuck in the elevator the night before the free skate."

"Well... at least if someone from the outside world knows we're in here and is looking for us, they won't be able to forget about us?"

"Alright..." Yuuri gave a begrudging nod.

"Maybe that was my plan all along," Phichit said defensively.

"It wasn't your plan all along."

 ~

"They forgot about us."

"If nothing happens in five minutes," Phichit declared, trying to sound authoritative, "we'll press the button again." His constant shuffling on the spot didn't make him look like a very convincing voice of reason.

"I'm not going to stand around and wait for them to get us out. I'm going to get some sleep," Yuuri declared, throwing his backpack into the corner and draping his jacket over it.

"What? You can't sleep on the floor."

"Don't tell me I can't sleep on the floor, you don't know I can't sleep on the floor. Watch me."

"No, I know you and I know you won't be able to sleep on the- aaaah, omigod, owwww." Phichit trailed off in the middle of his sentence, bent over and gripped the front of his pants from the outside. "I'm sorry I just did that. Like, not to be dramatic or anything but I'm basically dying."

"I didn't see what you did, but yeah, okay, do whatever you have to," Yuuri said from his spot on the floor, folding his jacket over his head.

"I don't know what to do, don't you have a bottle?"

"Yeah, but it's full of water? I just refilled it while we were at the mall. Which was probably good if we're going to be stuck in here for a while, but not good for... yeah. Sorry."

"This is homophobic!" Phichit wailed, throwing himself against the door in despair.

"There you are! Can you boys hear me?" Celestino's voice crackled in through the speaker. "Officer, please, those are two of my kids in there." His voice became more distant and was replaced by an unknown one.

"My name is Officer Potts and I'm with the Chicago police. We've just met up with your coach here, who, I'm sure you can hear, has been very worried about you," the man explained. The uplifting ping of a notification rang out and Phichit became distracted fielding replies to his earlier episode of oversharing, so Yuuri was forced to get up and take over the negotiations.

"Is anyone coming to get us out?" Yuuri pleaded.

"We've heard from the company. They think there was a power outage earlier that made everything go out of whack, and they've called maintenance to come out and reset it."

"Are you _livetweeting_ how badly you need to pee?" Yuuri asked Phichit, who stood hunched in the corner with one hand furiously typing on his phone and the other restlessly rubbing the fabric on his thigh.

"Excuse me?" asked the officer.

"Ah, nothing, sorry!" Yuuri said, blushing.

"We don't know where maintenance is yet, but the front desk wants us to hold tight and wait for them instead of breaking you out, if we can help it, and there are no life-threatening emergencies. Typical. How are you two doing in there?"

"Should I say something about...?" Yuuri turned to Phichit.

"Yes! What if I really, really need to go to the bathroom and it is an emergency?" Phichit blurted out.

"I don't think that's the kind of emergency they had in mind," the officer said with a chuckle. "Sorry, I know it's rough, but hold on a little while longer."

"How much longer?!"

"We don't know yet, we're-"

"Officer, you must understand, these athletes have a very important event tomorrow," Celestino could be heard in the background.

"I know, Celestino, I'm sorry, I'm trying to sleep on the floor!" Yuuri interjected.

"Yuuri, how is sleeping on the floor going to do you any good?" Celestino said directly into the speaker. "You probably won't be able to sleep there anyway."

"Why does everyone think I can't sleep on the floor if I want to?" Yuuri defiantly sat back down in the corner.

"Yuuri, don't do that to yourself, we'll get you out of there, by god, we will-" Celestino declared before the officer pushed him aside again.

"We're going to stay on the line with the company," the officer said. "We'll let you know as soon as we have more information." The speaker clicked off and Yuuri and Phichit looked at each other helplessly.

"Good thing we're used to waiting," Yuuri said glumly as he threw his jacket over his head again.

 ~

Phichit whined out loud as he shifted positions so he was kneeling and sitting on his heels.

"Phichit?" Yuuri said, sitting up.

"You don't have to worry about me, go back to sleep."

"I wasn't sleeping. The floor is too cold," Yuuri said sheepishly. He waited a few seconds for the laughter or teasing that he'd usually expect, but Phichit only turned away slightly and looked at the floor. "You don't really seem like you're okay?"

"I really have to go." Phichit's voice was small and awkward as the only thing he could think to say was what he had been repeating since they got back to the hotel, in simplest terms.

"They must have heard from the elevator technician by now, they have to call us again soon," Yuuri said, grasping at straws now that they were apparently switching roles and he was the one giving reassurance.

"I didn't think we were going to be in here this long," Phichit said pathetically. "Oh my god, I'm going to pee on the floor, I don't want to pee on the floor."

"Um... let's find something to do, like you always do for me when, you know," Yuuri offered. "What did that Canadian guy say about the picture? After you messaged him back?"

Phichit picked up his phone. "He said... aaaaaagh, I don't know." He didn't manage to check before shoving it back into his pocket and grinding the heel of his other hand into his lap.

"Okay, um, what kind of ice cream did you get? I don't think I've tried many kinds of coconut milk ice cream, and-"

"Nope. I can't do it. This can't be happening," Phichit interrupted, weakly holding onto the handrail with one hand to pull himself to his feet, his other hand tugging the waistband of his jeans. "Please, isn't there anything we can do? Can we call them?"

"Right, we'll do something, what will we do," Yuuri said quickly. He got up as well and contemplated the emergency button again. "If I press the button, it'll just call the front desk again and she'll have to redirect us again, right?" He didn't wait for a response from Phichit. "Okay, I'll call Celestino. I hope he's still there with the police. I can do this." Yuuri got out his phone and dialed in tense silence while Phichit whimpered next to him, leaning almost double against the handrail as if he was injured and shamelessly pacing in place. After a few muffled rings, Celestino answered.

"Yuuri? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"Well, sort of, but not really?"

"Yuuri?"

"Have you heard anything yet?"

"Listen, I can barely hear you. I'll get Officer Potts to call you, okay?"

"Uuuuuuggggghhhhhh," Yuuri sighed.

Phichit dug his phone, a handful of cash, gift cards, several tubes of chapstick and hand sanitiser out of his pockets and shoved it at Yuuri, who awkwardly put it in his hoodie. "Why are you giving me your- oh," Yuuri said.

"Please, I'm literally going."

"...like not-literally literally, or literally?"

"Li-ter-al-ly," Phichit hissed.

"Because I used to think it was a little weird that literally means what it does, but people use it to mean not literally, but then you started doing it all the time, so I thought it must be..."

"Great timing, boys," a voice crackled onto the speaker. "We just heard from the company, they're sending a technician from their office and thye'll be here in about fifteen minutes." Phichit turned his back to Yuuri, gasped and curled in on himself as if just hearing that caused him pain.

"Fifteen minutes?!" Yuuri cleared his throat and tried to sound confident. "My friend, um, really needs to use the restroom."

"We know, and I'm sorry about that," the officer said, "but at this point we couldn't get the fire department to bust you out faster than that if someone was dying."

"Come on, Yuuri, fifteen minutes, you're almost at the finish line," Celestino butted in.

"It's not me, it's Phichit."

"It's true!" Phichit cried in agreement. "I can't wait fifteen minutes, I really can't."

"...what _ever_ , you two, if you can't wait, you can't wait, but you'll have to try your best!" Celestino said.

"We'll keep you posted if there are any problems, alright?" the officer took control of the phone again. "But you're almost out, hang in there!" With nothing more to be done about the timeline for rescue, the emergency line clicked off. Yuuri turned to take in Phichit, who was beside himself and obviously barely in control, his legs jammed together so hard he was shaking and both hands almost constantly between them.

"Okay, let's take this one minute at a time," Yuuri said with a deep breath.

"Noooo!" Phichit's voice went alarmingly high and frantic as he turned his back to Yuuri again.

"T-thirty seconds?" Yuuri said. Phichit turned back around and the small wet patch not quite covered by his hands explained all there was to explain.

"What should I doooo?!"

"I- okay. Here." Yuuri crouched and grabbed his water bottle from his backpack, fumbled it open and began swallowing the contents. He made it about three-quarters of the way through before gagging and spitting out water all over himself and the floor. "Screw this." He threw out the rest of the water in the corner.

Phichit made a small sound of despair, looking down in horror at the streaks of wetness rapidly dripping down his light wash jeans, his efforts to manually stop the flow no longer effective.

"Come on, do the rest in the bottle, do it on the floor, it's going to get on the floor anyway, do something," Yuuri urged him.

But Phichit let his hands fall to his sides, parted his legs slightly and slumped against the wall with a long whine halfway between resignation and relief, wetting himself in earnest with such force that some of the liquid dripped straight to the floor through the fabric rather than just running down his thighs. The squelch of urine flowing into already wet fabric and patter of liquid forming a puddle on the tile were unavoidably, embarrassingly loud in the confined space, and Yuuri turned his back. Phichit continued to make small gasps of disbelief that this was happening to him, remaining almost stunned as he completely soaked his pants until he was empty.

"Wow," Phichit sighed, looking down, dejected, at the puddle he stood in. "This is so gross."

"Are you okay?" Yuuri cautiously turned around as if afraid to see what had happened.

"Yeah. Are you?"

~

When the elevator was brought to the nearest floor after another power shutdown, around half a dozen police officers and paramedics were waiting outside, with Celestino nervously peeking around them.

"Oh, jeez." Celestino was first to speak when the doors opened. Though the edges of the stain on Phichit's jeans had softened somewhat, it was still plainly obvious what had happened to him.

"Some of the water on the floor is just water, it's not all... um." Yuuri tried to explain to some hotel staff outside the door.

"How are you feeling, did you faint in there?" one of the responders asked Phichit, putting a sympathetic hand on his shoulder.

"No, I just drank too much coffee," he said, looking at the floor.

"Ah. Sorry about that, kid. Don't beat yourself up, I've seen worse."

After a few more questions, the police turned Yuuri and Phichit over to their coach.

"I'm sorry, Celestino," Yuuri began, "I was trying to get us back to the hotel earlier, it wasn't my idea, we just-"

"Yuuri, I'm just glad you're safe," Celestino sighed, clearly showing restraint. He looked over Phichit from head to toe. "Please take a shower and go to bed. That's all I have to say, go get some rest, both of you. You'll be good as new in the morning."

"Thanks, Ciao Ciao," Phichit said.

One of the hotel staff directed them to the stairwell and instructed them to walk the last few flights. They trudged up the stairs, neither having said much since Phichit's accident.

"Do you want me to check these, or anything?" Yuuri asked when Phichit's phone pinged in his pocket again.

"You can," Phichit said with a shrug. Yuuri scrolled through the list of notifications, mostly a sea of requests for updates on the elevator situation, sprinkled with laugh-crying emojis and 100s.

"I guess you probably don't wanna answer these- aah!" Phichit threw his arms around Yuuri's shoulders. Yuuri flinched and Phichit withdrew slightly in awareness that Yuuri wouldn't appreciate coming in contact with his wet jeans.

"What do I say now?!" Phichit sobbed.

"I... hmmm. You don't have to say anything, I guess." Yuuri put an arm around Phichit loosely, as if he didn't know exactly what to do with it.

"I thought it would just be a funny thing that happened, I didn't think it would go that far."

"Ah, I think I understand. You wanted to share something funny that happened to you, and you're upset that it didn't have a happy ending."

Phichit nodded and sniffled into Yuuri's hoodie.

"Hmmm. I say you don't have to tell anyone what happened if you don't want to. All the people who look up to you already think you're friendly and funny. I think so too - I know if I went through what you just did, my first worry wouldn't be whether I could share it and laugh about it," Yuuri said. "Maybe someday you'll be able to view it differently, but for now maybe you should just put it behind yourself and focus on the competition."

They reached their hotel room and as soon as Yuuri closed the door behind them and turned the light on, Phichit hugged Yuuri around the shoulders with both arms, still being considerate and keeping his lower body withdrawn.

"You know, Yuuri, you're actually really good at being the responsible adult in a situation when you have to be. Thanks." Phichit smiled sincerely at Yuuri before he kicked off his shoes and tiptoed to the bathroom.

"Oh... thank you too. I just try to do what you do for me."

"Can you get my PJs out and put them by the shower?"

"Yeah, of course."

"Also, you know what's funny?" Phichit called out as Yuuri rifled through his suitcase. "Peeing your pants would actually feel kind of amazing if it wasn't so embarrassing."

"Okay, goodnight," Yuuri said quickly, throwing Phichit's clothes into the bathroom.

Maybe Phichit would be able to laugh about this sooner rather than later.


End file.
